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UncyclopediaWikipediaを真似してるパロディーサイトです...前回Uncyclopediaについて書いた記事へ

今回は日本について。

書いてる事はすべでギャグの為のうそです、真剣に取ったら駄目ですよ

イントロダクション
“In fact the whole of Japan is pure invention. There is no such country, there are no such people.” ~ Oscar Wilde

Japan is the nation that is on the other side of the world, if you live in Amerika. It's that one that isn't China (or maybe it is--we aren't too sure about that). If you live in China, it's quite close. If you live in Japan, just look out of the window. (Japanese translation of this page Japan (in Japanese) available. Japanese is here, English is here. WONDERFUL FUN! BIG CRUNCH TIME? SUPER ELBOWS!)


日本語版:イントロダクション
日本は世界の反対側にある国である。それは中国ではない(多分)。


日本のモンスター
The Japanese landscape is littered with various overgrown monsters that are the result of natural springs that produce potent nuclear waste. Godzilla is the most popular of these creatures, capable of reaching heights up to 500 feet tall. However, despite its reputed gentle nature, it has been known to devour tourists that try to feed it.

Other monsters include Mozilla, Gamera, Sailor Mercury, and Mothra and a wide assortment of other rubbery mutants. As stated above, Japan has been able to make use of these creatures with the exception of Mothra, which has been named an endangered species.

Not to mention a plethora of other monsters, mostly consisting of massive insects. These insects are easily recognizable - not only are they huge, but from a distance they appear to be a trick of the eye, much like an old bluescreen effect.

Among the Japanese schoolgirls, tentacle monsters (ブッシュ大統領) are the most popular. These cuddly, tiny mouse-like creatures are often captured and kept as pets or tapped for their electrical prowess.
[edit]
Monster Battles

Many areas in the Archipelego seems to have its own "Home" monster.

Examples:

* Honshuu: Godzilla
o Nagano: Orga
o Shinjuku: MechaGodzilla
* Hokkaido: Yamata No Orochi
* Okinawa: King Ceaser Shisa
* Kyushu: Gamera (Also home to Excel)
* Shikoku: Rodan
* Galveston: Yajuu, the japanese reincanation of TangelaKitchenTimer with only one head.

These monsters regularly meet for regular Territorial bouts, fenced in by large "War-Walls" to protect the surrounding property and precious schoolgirls, camera drones and announcers (who deliver constant info to specators, for a fee). Often the color commentary is done in traditional Japanese song, with the monster's name being the only lyric. The most famous song, written by Junichiro Koizumi reads as follows:

Gozeerah! Goooozerah! (repeat)

Usually, at least one happens each week, and a small portion of the revenue is used for a variety of noble causes. The majority of the funds, however, are funneled off to special interests like the Pregnant Schoolgirl Coalition, Sentai Comission and many varied evil organizations (see: NERV).

There also exists a junior league, mostly consisting of the children of the major-league monsters (Son of Mothra, etc.). Each Spring and Summer, they compete in a national competition called the Koshien. The winner of the tournament is allowed to travel to America to compete for the world crown against mosters such as Godzilla 2000, Aliens, Sigourney Weaver in a Huge Robot, Those Moth Things in that Miro Sorvino Movie, and the Tremors Worms.


日本語版:日本のモンスター
 日本の風景には、生育しすぎたさまざまな怪獣がいたるところに出現している。これは、核廃棄物を作り出す自然の泉によって生まれたものである。ゴジラはその中でも最も人気の高い生物で、高さ500フィートに達することがある。しかし、その温厚な性質にもかかわらず、旅行者を食べようとすることでも有名だ。

 他の怪獣として、ガメラ、モスラ、ゴムのような突然変異種のさまざまな組み合わせなどがある。上述のように日本はモスラ以外のこれらの生物を利用することができるようになっている。モスラは絶滅寸前種とされている。


天皇
Emperors of Japan

* Emperor Sudoku (314–652–789)
* Emperor Doraemon (1104–1303)
* Emperor Nintendo (1304–1897)
* Emperor Mitsubishi (1897–1912)
* Emperor Hirohito (1913–1990)
* Emperor Crayon Shin-chan (1991–1997)
* Emperor Pikachu (1998–1999)
* Emperor Yon Sama (2000–yesterday)
* Emperor Yes Ter Daishi (yesterday–present)
* Emperor Horiemon (near future)
* Empress Nevada (future)


日本語版:天皇
日本天皇

* ドラえもん天皇 (1104–1303)
* 任天堂天皇 (1304–1897)
* 三菱グループ天皇 (1897–1912)
* 昭和天皇 (1913–1990)
* クレヨンしんちゃん天皇 (1991–1997)
* ピカチュー天皇 (1998–1999)
* ヨンサマ天皇 (2000–現在)
* ネバダ天皇 (未来)
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